Both sad and happy...

i'm popping meji chocolates in my office now, while typing this entry. i'm feeling quite down actually... i shouldn't be but can't help it. i'm trying hard to make myself accept some truths...

anyway, some happy news... [no, i'm not getting married yet...]
last week... i can finally sit on the driver's seat of my dad's car.

i didn't pin too much hopes for the test actually, since this is like the dunno-how-many-times attempts. furthermore, the look of my instructors don't look too encouraging during the lessons. one of them was saying "for your test, if you did not commit this, that, this, this plus that mistakes you should be able to pass". i was like 'yeah man', an indirect way to say it's hard for me to pass la.

though i was not confident, i still pray to God.... hoping that i'll not be nervous (which i usu do), stay clam and alert. i'll leave the rest to God. and this time round, i also did one more thing... i purposely wore a red bra. i can't believe i'll ever do this. but based on what bryan wong once said in stars award, it should bring you good luck. Hahah…

during the test, i can still remember some things go pretty wrong...
1. i tried to do the pendicular parking. reversed twice but still not able to go in smoothly. only succeed the third time. i dunno whether i exceed 3 mins, which is the time limit for p parking
2. during parallel parking, my left leg - which control the clutch - suddenly shook very badly. i never exp this before. it was so obvious that i bet the tester must have saw it. luckily, i park smoothly
3. almost went into a yellow box at a junction when the light was red.
4. i did not turn on the right signal when i was going so near to the next lane.
5. i almost can't cut from lane 1 to lane 3 for a u-turn. but the drivers at the back were so kind to give way to me. i'll kiss them if i know who they are now.

After we drove back to school… I followed the tester to the evaluation room. I was quite convinced that I have to get ready to book another test date and I swear to learn auto car the next time round. The tester then start to speak “why you drive so slow ah? The road can go 50 km/h, you drive only 40 km/h. your instructors teach you to drive so slow?”

“hm… I will go faster next time” I said softly

“why? Why you drive so slow? You know slow can deduct points not?” and the tester kept repeating this question while I was trying to peep the score sheet. Shit! Saw a few ticks (means demerit points, if more than 18 means fail). My heart turned cold.

“you drive so slow I can give you this offence [started pointing that particularly line] you know. This offence means 8 points.” He underlined that line but did not tick. He sighed and finally said “ok, wo3 wan3 kai1 yi2 mian4 (give you chance/opportunity), let you pass.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. Is he joking? I actually passed? Hot tears started rolling down my face. I kept thanking the tester. This day has finally come!

For the rest of the days, I was pinching my face to make sure that I wasn’t dreaming. I’m serious. It is just too good to be true for me. I can't stop smiling for the rest of last week and also whenever i'm behind the wheels.

But I believe this is only the start. I feel I’m not that good on the roads yet. Still have a lot to learn from my daddy, the old ginger. However, the joy of finally obtaining that licence is a dream come true.